Episode 7

Transcript:

00:00:00
Okay, welcome to Comically Exposed, Episode 7. I am Heather.

00:00:13
And I'm Gabbie.

00:00:15
And I am introducing us for the third time. And still having a reaction to it, which is

00:00:23
my exposure for this podcast.

00:00:25
Yeah, we talked about it just before we started. And Heather realized that doing the announcements

00:00:33
is a sort of exposure and that she didn't really want to do it, which always means,

00:00:39
gotta do it.

00:00:40
And I think you did a great job. So how you feeling? Where's your anxiety on the old

00:00:47
sud scale, 1 to 10?

00:00:50
I think I'm close to an 8.

00:00:53
Wow.

00:00:54
Yeah.

00:00:55
I had no idea it was that high.

00:00:58
Yeah, it kind of freaks me out.

00:01:01
Okay. Well, you mask a little too effectively, I must say.

00:01:06
I do very well. Thank you for noticing.

00:01:13
It's like me complimenting your self-criticism. Do you know what I mean? It's like not something

00:01:19
that you should be proud of necessarily.

00:01:24
It's amazing. Thank you. I'm so good at masking. This is not making me feel like I'm gonna

00:01:34
roll over and die any second or some number of things that are going to happen or disassociating

00:01:40
or...

00:01:41
Yeah. Oh yeah. Stay grounded. Stay grounded. Where are your feet?

00:01:44
My feet are touching the thing that's holding my feet up because I cannot touch the floor.

00:01:51
Already off to a really good start. But honestly, so for people who don't know what the sud

00:01:58
scale is, it's the anxiety scale that you rate yourself on. I think we talked about

00:02:03
it on some episode, but it either goes from 1 to 10 or some people do 1 to 100. And the

00:02:09
exposure is supposed to raise up your anxiety and then you're supposed to sit with it while

00:02:15
your anxiety comes back down. So Heather, it's been 20 seconds. Where's your anxiety

00:02:21
at?

00:02:23
Well now that I'm distancing from it, it feels like it's lowering. Not as rapidly, but it

00:02:29
feels like it's getting closer to six or five.

00:02:33
Cool.

00:02:34
I still feel something in my stomach, like something bad's going to happen.

00:02:41
That's just life. That's what that is.

00:02:43
But it doesn't feel like it's necessarily death at the moment.

00:02:47
So that's good. We'll take that. Not necessarily death at the moment. That is also the name

00:02:55
of our podcast.

00:02:59
Well, we haven't seen or talked to each other for a minute, except before the podcast where

00:03:08
we talked for quite a bit and did not record any of it. You're welcome.

00:03:12
Yeah. You didn't want to hear us testing our mics.

00:03:15
No, although it was, I would say we should get the Nobel Peace Prize for how amazing that

00:03:23
went.

00:03:24
Yeah, riveting material.

00:03:26
Completely. Who doesn't love a good mic test?

00:03:30
Oh yeah, the reason I brought up that we haven't seen each other for a while is because I thought

00:03:36
we might be able to talk about a mutual goal, which was getting into SketchFest 2024. I

00:03:47
think the day after we recorded last week, we finally got the email and we did not get

00:03:56
into SketchFest.

00:03:57
Yeah. Uh-huh.

00:03:58
Yep.

00:03:59
So how do you feel about it?

00:04:05
I'm disappointed because I was really excited about making something with you and Susan.

00:04:11
Not to say that we can't still do it. Screw them.

00:04:19
I feel the exact same way. It was going to be a great excuse for all three of us to actually

00:04:25
be in person and hang out. It was going to give us deadlines to really write sketches

00:04:31
and then film or rehearse or whatever, get props together. Yeah, just make real the stuff

00:04:42
that we've just been talking about over the past two years. Yeah, so I am also disappointed.

00:04:51
And I also have a lot of questions. I know that in the email that we received, they did

00:04:57
say that they got a record number of submissions. And so, you know, that's why they didn't even,

00:05:04
they had to push back the date on when they were going to tell people whether they got

00:05:07
into the festival because they got so many submissions. And that's great. Good for them.

00:05:13
But also, I find it kind of disappointing and also annoying because I was in SketchFest

00:05:21
the year before and I think our group is funnier. And I was really excited for the stuff that

00:05:30
we were putting together. And so, I'm just kind of like, well, what happened? Because,

00:05:36
what? And if that's not careful analysis, I don't know what is.

00:05:49
That's exactly how I felt. And then on top of that, I was just thinking, like, if we

00:05:54
did want to do stuff together, we could still do it, whether or not it's sketch or something

00:05:58
else. But I think it's good to kind of expose perceived failures because it's not really

00:06:04
a failure. I mean, it is and it isn't because we did put ourselves out there. We did make

00:06:11
a reel. We did do all the paperwork. I don't know. And we did get to meet weekly. So, it

00:06:22
was nice to be able to see all of your faces and just kind of just be silly with each other.

00:06:29
Yeah, I completely agree with that. I'm excited for us to figure out how we take... Our group

00:06:36
is called Knot Sisters, K-N-O-T, if you're looking us up on Instagram or the other things.

00:06:43
But I'm interested to see like where we can take Knot Sisters, what else we can do with

00:06:47
it, you know, other festivals, that kind of thing or whatever we want to do, which is

00:06:51
great. And I'd love for us to talk a little bit about the perceived failures because I

00:06:57
am definitely in that place right now. I mean, having also been rejected from the podcast,

00:07:03
the late night TV show podcast, it just feels like I just got rejection after rejection,

00:07:09
even though it's only two. Yeah. But as we talk about putting ourselves out there is

00:07:14
very difficult. And so, it feels like I exposed myself and the world said, no, thank you.

00:07:22
And on top of that, I listened to the most recent episode of that other podcast and it

00:07:27
is just as terrible as it has always been, if not worse. I found myself like yelling

00:07:35
at my phone and then just I had to turn it off. So... Maybe it was a good thing that

00:07:42
you... Yeah. You might've been more frustrated. So, I found out this thing that comes with

00:07:51
ADHD, which is called RSD, who doesn't love a bajillion acronyms, and it's rejection sensitivity

00:08:01
disorder, right? And first of all, I'm like, doesn't everybody have that? Like who's out

00:08:07
here being like, oh, joy, I was rejected again. Gosh, it makes me such a strong individual

00:08:12
and I'm just going to get up tomorrow and attack the day. But instead it's like, oh,

00:08:18
this feels like a real read on who I am at the core, right? And it's my fears of being

00:08:29
a worthless person, right? Yeah. Yeah. So, I'm glad I get to share the rejection with

00:08:38
two other people, you and Susan, so that I can at least tell myself.

00:08:47
Well, it wasn't me. I'm just kidding. Yeah. I mean, rejection is very... I mean, it is

00:08:58
relatable outside of the disorder and it can feel painful. Yeah. Not wanted, not good enough,

00:09:07
all the nots and so, not sisters. That's it. There it is. It's how you move on and what

00:09:18
you take for... Like whether or not you take it in, I guess. I mean, I don't really have

00:09:23
a good feeling about it because it still feels a little bit raw. Yeah. You know?

00:09:28
Well, I like that I was made it as just dropped it on you for the podcast and was like, let's

00:09:34
talk about this. This feels painful and new. One exposure after another. That's right.

00:09:43
Yeah. Where's your suds at now? Where are you at? Yeah. Well, there's not so much anxiety

00:09:49
around it. I mean, I think at first there may have been a little bit of embarrassment,

00:09:56
but I think now it's just more about disappointment. Yeah. Yeah. It's been a week now and or a

00:10:03
little over a week. It's just feeling just slightly disappointing. Yeah. Yeah. It's motivation

00:10:09
sometimes for me though to figure out what I'm going to do next. And so Gabbie, what else

00:10:18
new is happening with you? Thank you so much for asking. Well, before I get into all of

00:10:24
the things that I said I was going to do last time, I do want to say that I started TMS,

00:10:32
cranial magnetic stimulation for the depression. Although now we just started doing bilateral,

00:10:39
which means both hemispheres of my brain are being stimulated, which means not only is

00:10:45
the depression hopefully going to be alleviated, but also being overall anxiety is hopefully

00:10:51
going to be dampened. I don't know. So while I'm very excited about that, it is five days

00:10:58
a week at 8 a.m. and I forgot because the last times I did TMS was like five years ago,

00:11:07
I forgot how exhausting it is and it's not the process itself. Like literally I'm just

00:11:13
watching stand-up specials and having these tiny little zaps on the top of my head, but

00:11:19
it is, I don't know, there's like a physical body exhaustion that is just, I'm two weeks

00:11:26
in and usually treatments are five to six weeks. So this weekend I'm really going to

00:11:31
rest, but if I am not just so quick and funny today, I'm going to blame it on that. Woohoo.

00:11:43
Yeah, woohoo.

00:11:47
Exactly. So on that note, okay, so we talked about sketch vests. I have no update on whether

00:11:54
or not I got into mortified, although based on this current trend and then you and I-

00:12:03
Instant rejection.

00:12:04
Yeah, exactly. This is why I usually reject the whole process first before I can be rejected.

00:12:13
So much safer that way in this little tiny box, but truncated life. But you sent me a

00:12:22
really cool graphic for my Bat Shat Roommate podcast, which I really love. And then we

00:12:28
got to talk a little bit more about that, the aesthetics of the podcast and all of that.

00:12:33
So I'm getting more and more excited. I did have a reunion this past weekend for a summer

00:12:39
camp that I grew up at and then worked at. And what I meant to do at the reunion was

00:12:46
ask people to be on the podcast. Because just the fact that we all worked at this summer

00:12:53
camp, I know that we all had Bat Shat roommates because it's just like, I mean, you're 20

00:13:02
something and that's the way it is. But I did not ask people. So I had a good time instead.

00:13:10
I enjoyed talking to people. So I guess that's a success.

00:13:16
That you weren't working the room, trying to pitch people.

00:13:19
Passing out business cards.

00:13:20
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

00:13:21
I was just going to be like, hey, have you thought about podcasts? No. So I guess that'll

00:13:31
be the next things. But anyway, so that's what I did over the past couple of weeks.

00:13:37
What about you, dear friend Heather?

00:13:40
I have been working on humor pieces, mainly because I am taking a class currently with

00:13:47
Luke Burns and just been really into it. It's a different style of writing. I'm constantly

00:13:54
fighting myself to not make it a story, which I think is a good exercise in just focusing

00:14:01
on the joke rather than the whole story arc. But it is getting me excited to write stories

00:14:09
more, which is also the weird counteraction that's happening right now. And it's just

00:14:15
funny what writing can do, like any kind of writing can do to motivate you to see things.

00:14:21
But I am not jumping ship from the humor. I'm really trying hard to focus on that. And

00:14:28
taking on projects like helping you out with a graphic for your podcast.

00:14:33
Thank you so, so, so much.

00:14:36
You're welcome. As another way to find an outlet for creativity. And it's been, I don't

00:14:42
know, for me, it's been kind of enlightening, like kind of fun and I don't know, exciting

00:14:48
to get things started and do things new. And hopefully that's being presented to what I'm

00:14:55
doing. It's at least exciting to me. Whoever else thinks it's exciting then or funny or

00:15:02
interesting or whatever is, you know, just a bonus. So yeah.

00:15:07
That's awesome. So do you have any stories that are percolating?

00:15:12
I'm coming up with a new podcast that is more scripted, improvised slash scripted. And so

00:15:20
I'm playing with this idea that I just got yesterday and I won't divulge too much because

00:15:26
I'm like, I don't want to sell the idea just yet to myself.

00:15:29
You don't want to lock into anything right now.

00:15:31
Yeah. Cause I'm still trying to figure it out and, but I'm really excited about it.

00:15:37
So it's something I want to produce and put out in the world. And so that's kind of where

00:15:44
I am at the moment.

00:15:45
So cool.

00:15:46
Yeah. I'm excited about it. Also, I wanted to do something scripted or, you know, kind

00:15:52
of in that fictional world to kind of build a world. And I just, I think I'm missing that

00:15:57
at the moment.

00:15:58
Yeah. But different from doubt it because I feel like doubt it has some real personal

00:16:05
themes.

00:16:06
Yeah. Doubt it's a little bit.

00:16:08
That make it a little more tough to be like, oh joy, I'm going to work on this thing that

00:16:15
brings up feelings. I don't know. I could be projecting.

00:16:18
Yeah, no, I think I want to work on both one, you know, I really want the doubt it script

00:16:25
to be done. I think that it'd be really good show, especially for those who don't understand

00:16:30
OCD to kind of be in a person's head, at least with something with a similar OCD to me. And

00:16:39
it is relatable partially. It's the disordered part that becomes, you know, expressed more.

00:16:45
And I think it's important because representation is important to our very misunderstood diagnosis

00:16:54
and disorder. So it's, it's, I think I've said this before, it's hard to explain. And

00:16:59
so I want to show people, or at least I've been toying with the idea of whether or not

00:17:04
it's an audio story or if it's a visual story. Yeah. And so that that's actually part of

00:17:14
the hesitation because one, I know I can produce something pretty easily. Not easily. I say

00:17:21
easily, but it's not easily. I could produce something more excessively with audio, right?

00:17:28
There's some visual components to it that I'm really wanting to make just audio, if

00:17:35
that makes sense. Oh, totally. Yeah. Yeah. And that's such an interesting part of the

00:17:40
creative process to not to generalize, but it's like you start writing something and

00:17:45
you're like, Oh, this is a is a stand up, you know, bit and then you're like, No, no,

00:17:52
that's a sketch. No, it's definitely not a sketch. This is like a humor piece or no,

00:17:58
it's definitely not because it needs the visuals. Okay. Okay. I think a short cartoon would

00:18:03
really work, you know? Yeah. Cool. Well, and I'm, and I'm also being flexible with my method

00:18:12
because not just because of limitations, but also because just being able to play in those

00:18:18
different kind of mediums, you know, is kind of interesting to me, at least for right now.

00:18:24
The world is big when you're starting out. So that's kind of, I don't know. I don't want

00:18:30
to limit myself in my playground. Yeah. No playground limiting here. So that's, that's

00:18:40
where I am at with something new, but I want to get through my humor classes. So I'm, I'm

00:18:45
trying to write notes to myself in terms of what I want to do and then, but put focus

00:18:52
back on to the work in front of me. So good. Great. Yeah. I think you're doing great. I

00:19:01
don't know why that made me laugh. It's been, it's maybe the nerves, you know, it's like,

00:19:10
I'm doing great. Am I doing great? I don't know. I can't say for myself if I'm doing

00:19:18
great, that's up to other people to judge and decide. Yeah. But then the short answer

00:19:23
is sure. That part, that part. Okay. Well, I think that brings us to, what do you want

00:19:32
to do in the next couple of weeks? So what do you? Yeah. Thank you for asking. Fully

00:19:39
organically. Yes. Yes. And not scripted at all. Not at all. I think right now, I think

00:19:46
this week, my main focus is the humor pieces and to finish them. I have, no, I have finished

00:19:53
ones. I just have to edit them and the editing process is, I don't know. I mean, there's

00:19:58
no feelings attached to the editing process. It kind of feels like a natural part of the

00:20:03
next step to kind of reiterate. It's just, I don't want to reiterate too many times.

00:20:09
Sure. Because that could lead to something else like perfectionism and other things like

00:20:15
that. So I'm allowing it to be messy and be what it is. And our mutual goal of working

00:20:24
on the graphic and announcement or promo, hopefully will come out in the next few weeks

00:20:31
so that you can get your podcast going. Yes. Yes for a bash it. Yep. Yep. Yep. I've only

00:20:40
been talking about it for seriously 10 years. So, you know, I don't know that it's time

00:20:45
yet, probably another decade under my belt and then I'll get around to it. But I'm with

00:20:51
you. I think that's so legit. So what are you going to work on? Oh, no, no, no, no.

00:20:57
I was going to say that something I think you've said before is that you really enjoy

00:21:02
the editing process, like with your writing and stuff, which is fascinating to me because

00:21:08
I am just like, oh dear God, I have to look at this thing again and now I have to make

00:21:14
decisions and this is all too much. But I can see how it potentially could lead to perfectionism.

00:21:19
Yeah. But I also think it is a stage of your creative process that brings you joy. Yeah.

00:21:26
That's awesome. Yeah. I like to fix a mess. No, I mean, I like. And that's why we're working

00:21:36
together. I get it. I know my place. No, no, no, no. I like, I guess. So putting it all

00:21:46
out there feels very vulnerable. Like when you're doing the first draft, it feels like

00:21:51
it's so messy. It's so like can be disgusting. Like, oh my God, that's nonsensical. Like,

00:21:58
I don't understand. Like, like, why did I think that was interesting or whatever? And

00:22:04
I'm like totally judgmental. But the editing process, for some odd reason, I can pull myself

00:22:10
out of it a little bit more and then looking at it for what it is. I don't know why that's

00:22:18
different for me. And the problem is, is that because I don't finish some things in terms

00:22:24
of the first draft, it's almost like I don't want to finish the first draft. I just want

00:22:29
to start editing. Whoa. Yeah. And so. Fascinating. Yeah. And I think that's why my beginnings

00:22:36
are always so tight because I'm just like, I'm just ready to rewrite it. I mean, right

00:22:42
now I am fighting myself to edit, doubt it. I have had little conversations with myself

00:22:51
to not like get into it and edit the first, the beginning. Cause I already have notes

00:22:56
for myself in terms of what I want to change. And then I'm trying to convince myself that

00:23:01
it's going to change the entire story. But the truth is it's not. It's just a better

00:23:06
joke. It's a tighter, you know, movement through the cold open. That's just what it is. But

00:23:11
no, I just need to get, I just need to get through it and need to finish it. Yeah. That

00:23:16
part. That is the part of the process that is. I don't know if that came across, but

00:23:26
the slog part, I guess. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, okay. So speaking of slogs, there are

00:23:34
three goals that I want going forward. I've been talking about it, but I actually want

00:23:40
to sit down and look at my calendar and pick a date for a table read or one of my spec

00:23:45
scripts. I want to finish this sketch that I started writing in time for our sketch group

00:23:50
on Sunday. And I think I want to give, I recorded an initial batshit roommate with my sister,

00:23:59
but we were in the same room and now you and I use a squad cast to record our podcast.

00:24:05
And so I'm going to see if I can use it with my sister and see if her sound is okay without

00:24:12
a fancy mic or whatever. And then, you know, maybe have that be the first episode and it's

00:24:18
going to be so good that I will finally get the aforementioned peace prize as well as,

00:24:24
you know, people are going to be clamoring to be on that podcast. Yeah. So, you know,

00:24:29
goals, easily achievable. Yeah. Yeah. So do you need baby steps in that one too? Or are

00:24:43
you just feeling? For the squad cast one? Yeah. Nah, I think I just need to text my

00:24:49
sister and see, because luckily for me, it's getting dark sooner, which means she finishes

00:24:56
farming sooner, which means she has enough like energy at the end of the day that I can

00:25:01
be like, Hey buddy, congratulations. You're going to be on my podcast. Who doesn't want

00:25:12
to work like a full day from sunrise to sunset and then be harangued by the older sister

00:25:18
to do something. I mean, that's our job. That's right. As older siblings. That's right. Yeah.

00:25:26
It's a tough job, but you know, obviously we have to do it because yes. Yes. I mean,

00:25:32
that's the new name of our podcast. What? Obviously we have to do it. Yeah. Obviously

00:25:37
we have to do it or the older ones. The older ones. Perfect. Is a hundred percent the branding

00:25:45
that I am going for this next decade. Yes. Yeah. So those are my things. I feel like

00:25:51
I'm really tired. I heard he talked about that. I'm still really tired. So I'm hoping

00:25:57
these are okay things to accomplish. Yeah. Yeah. Sounds I think it sounds great. Thank

00:26:03
you Heather. All right. Should we tell the people to go after themselves? Yeah. Close

00:26:12
out the podcast. Yeah. Yes. Kind people that have continued to listen to the end. Thank

00:26:19
you for listening everyone. Yeah. And yeah, have a good day. Yeah. Have a good day. Goodbye.

00:26:28
Goodbye. Welcome to the end of the show. This is Gabbie Blachman and this is Heather Nye.

00:26:38
I thank you for listening to comically exposed. We are just a little show with two creators

00:26:44
who edit and produce each episode. We appreciate all your support. If you like what you heard,

00:26:50
please follow us on Instagram at comically exposed podcast. That's C O M I C A L L Y

00:26:58
E X P dot podcast or subscribe to us on Spotify or wherever you listen to podcasts. New episodes

00:27:08
drop every other Wednesday. Also special thanks to Track Club and Gxldxn Fxnch for providing

00:27:13
the music. Thanks for listening. And hey, everybody, today is a great day to expose

00:27:19
yourself. Okay, until next time. Ta da for today. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.